Why?

The football world is still coming to terms with the shocking news that Gary Speed has taken his own life at the ridiculously young age of 42. As the tributes pour in (and why do tributes always “pour” in?) the question everyone is asking is “why?” Why did a young man, at the top of his profession, with a wife and two teenaged boys, loved and respected by everyone in the game, decide to end it all so suddenly?

It would be unhelpful and disrespectful to speculate as to the reasons behind Gary Speed’s suicide – nobody truly knows what goes on inside the mind of people with mental health issues, if indeed that was the case. But, to me, the saddest aspect is that, whatever demons had taken over his mind, or whatever problems he had, he felt unable to turn to anyone for help. He was clearly a popular man and had a lot of friends both inside and outside the sport. But the extent to which the world has been utterly stunned by his death shows he was unable to confide in any of these friends.

It’s a sad reflection on our society that the stigma attached to mental health issues is so great that many people see suicide as preferable to admitting that they have an issue. And it’s also a tragedy that people don’t realise help is out there. Family and friends will listen, and they will understand, because they love you come what may. Mental illness is just that – an illness. It’s not your fault, it’s not a weakness, it’s just an illness that can affect anyone. And if you don’t feel you can turn to your loved ones, there are professionals who can help. Despite the government’s best efforts, we still have a wonderful mental health care system in this country and your GP should be your first port of call. But organisations like Mind, SANE and the MHF, and, if you do find yourself seemingly at the point of no return, the Samaritans, are also there to help.

As I mentioned in my last blog post, I’ve managed to get a place in the 2012 London Marathon. I’d already more or less made the decision to run for a charity, but Sunday’s events, and the realisation that, had I not turned to the professionals for help, that could easily have been me one day, have persuaded me that I should run for Mind. I’ll be setting up a fundraising page shortly. Hopefully I can raise some much needed cash and, equally importantly, raise people’s awareness of mental health issues and help break down the stigma surrounding mental illness. Your support will be greatly appreciated.

Gary Speed

8 September 1969 – 27 November 2011

RIP